Help with english

Bane · Post by **Bane** » Wed Jun 20, 2007 5:00 am

Hola amigos!

I have recently finished writing an essay in school and with that we are told to write an english abstract, ~3 pages long. So in order to spare myself from unnessacery sweat and tears I wonder if anyone of you guys have a masive vocabulary and insanely good writing skills?

And if you do, have it in your heart to help a poor student who's only wish is to end this torture that is called school and travel to greece with his girlfriend(on sunday, woohoo!) knowing the essay is 100% finished!?

My plan is to write as good english as I, and my co-workers, can and then let any of you guys read it and suggest improvements in the english grammatics, words and other stuff.

Koric · Post by **Koric** » Wed Jun 20, 2007 6:35 am

I got an A in both my college English courses, post it up!

PeteyBoy23 · Post by **PeteyBoy23** » Wed Jun 20, 2007 8:58 am

I wouldn't mind checking it over either.

Post by **Kadian** » Wed Jun 20, 2007 11:16 am

My Professors seem to like my writing style, I'd be willing to give it a once over. I end up doing a lot of proofreading for my wife, expecially when she was in Pharmacy school.

flint · Post by **flint** » Wed Jun 20, 2007 1:35 pm

Kadian wrote:I end up doing a lot of proofreading for my wife, expecially when she was in Pharmacy school.

haha way to show off the grammar skills for Bane

shiram · Post by **shiram** » Wed Jun 20, 2007 1:39 pm

i r teh anglish suks
sowwy

Styrofoam · Post by **Styrofoam** » Wed Jun 20, 2007 1:51 pm

I was an english major.....

so, i'll lend my help as well..

Post by **Kadian** » Wed Jun 20, 2007 2:07 pm

Grammar and spelling are two different things, plus I don't check what I type in here, not even for grammar.

Sounds like Styro might be the best bet anyway, and as you can see he doesn't check his grammar on here either, lol

ThePluq · Post by **ThePluq** » Wed Jun 20, 2007 2:07 pm

your avatar = win kad

Post by **Kadian** » Wed Jun 20, 2007 2:09 pm

I stole it from somebody on SWG forums, lol.

Bane · Post by **Bane** » Wed Jun 20, 2007 2:51 pm

Thanks alot, you guys are the greatest! I'll finish it tomorrow and send it to your registered emails if it's alright!

And since I can't decide for juts one of you to help me, I just say the more the merrier, and send a copy to you all! If you got the time, I would appreciate it alot

Man, love you guys, seriously

Bane · Post by **Bane** » Thu Jul 12, 2007 10:47 am

Hola

We postponed it for a while but has now finally written a small abstract which I would love to get comments on.

What I want ya to look for, should you choose to read this, are; grammatical errors, bad choice of words, bad sentances, well practically everything that makes the text look bad. And I would also like you to give alternatives to what I've written and tell me why what I wrote was wrong (I want to learn from my mistakes). I hope to make this english summary of my essay impeccable and flawless

Thx in advance!

Bane · Post by **Bane** » Thu Jul 12, 2007 10:53 am

EDIT: Deleted text to avoid being accused for plagirism(sp?).

There are more but we haven't really worked with those as much as the above, so I'm leaving that out. Don't wanna waste any more of your guys' time

Post by **Kadian** » Thu Jul 12, 2007 11:58 am

I dumped it into Microsoft Word just to find some of the typos and simple little errors. I don't have enough time at the moment to look into sentence structure.

1. In the "Problem Disscussion" section, third sentence.
"They claim that more research need to be carried out......." Add an "s" after "need" (just a typo I'm sure)

2. Same section, last sentence.
"Neither is it communicated why a particular risk management measure is implemented in order manage a certain risk."
I think you are missing a "to" between order and manage, so it would be "in order to manage"

3. In the "Research Method" section, second sentence.
Furthermore, the industry’s high amount of fixed costs indicate a high level of business risk exposure.
It should either be "high amounts of fixed costs indicate" or "high amount of fixed costs indicates". I think the second one sounds more correct to me.

4. Theoretical Famework section, second paragraph, second to last sentence.
Another risk management purposeAccording to stakeholder theory companies could implement risk management measures in order to meet demands on such measures from various stakeholders.
As you can see you have "purposeAccording" with no space, and according should not be capitalized. I also think maybe you wanted an "is" or "is that" between theory and companies.

5. Last think Microsoft points out...Results and Conclusions, second paragraph, last sentence.
Finally, the propensity to act on the basis of market predictions is higher when a company is dealing with so-called dynamical risks than with statical risks.
Perhaps just a spelling error here, is it supposed to be "statistical risk" at the end?

The only other thing that came up, which probably isn't a big deal, is that it appears that you have accent marks instead of an apostrophe in words like isn't.
That's all I have time for, I'll look more later.

Bane · Post by **Bane** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 9:01 am

Thank you for taking the time to help me

Kadian wrote:I dumped it into Microsoft Word just to find some of the typos and simple little errors. I don't have enough time at the moment to look into sentence structure.

1. In the "Problem Disscussion" section, third sentence.
"They claim that more research need to be carried out......." Add an "s" after "need" (just a typo I'm sure)

2. Same section, last sentence.
"Neither is it communicated why a particular risk management measure is implemented in order manage a certain risk."
I think you are missing a "to" between order and manage, so it would be "in order to manage"

3. In the "Research Method" section, second sentence.
Furthermore, the industry’s high amount of fixed costs indicate a high level of business risk exposure.
It should either be "high amounts of fixed costs indicate" or "high amount of fixed costs indicates". I think the second one sounds more correct to me.

Thanks, I'll change those things!

Kadian wrote:4. Theoretical Famework section, second paragraph, second to last sentence.
Another risk management purposeAccording to stakeholder theory companies could implement risk management measures in order to meet demands on such measures from various stakeholders.
As you can see you have "purposeAccording" with no space, and according should not be capitalized. I also think maybe you wanted an "is" or "is that" between theory and companies.

That's a stupid error, we haven't choosed which start of the sentance we want to use yet, heh.. It should be a " / " in between the two 'options'

"Another risk management purpose/According to stakeholder theory "

Kadian wrote:5. Last think Microsoft points out...Results and Conclusions, second paragraph, last sentence.
Finally, the propensity to act on the basis of market predictions is higher when a company is dealing with so-called dynamical risks than with statical risks.
Perhaps just a spelling error here, is it supposed to be "statistical risk" at the end?

Hehe, nope! It's statical and dynamical risks we're talking about in this essay

EDIT: Hmm.. Maybe it's supposed to be "static/dynamic" and not "statical? That could be why you misunderstood me..

Kadian wrote:The only other thing that came up, which probably isn't a big deal, is that it appears that you have accent marks instead of an apostrophe in words like isn't.That's all I have time for, I'll look more later.

Heh, that's so funny! We had that discussion, me and my partner, on whih to use: ` or '
I said we should use ', but my rather dominant partner thought different.. I find it funny as hell that my way was the right one, and I can't wait to rub it in his face!

Post by **Kadian** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 10:24 am

Yeah, I wasn't sure about the "statical" only because it wasn't recognized by Microsoft Word, but static makes sense too. Actually static and dynamic makes a lot of sense now that I think about it.

Styrofoam · Post by **Styrofoam** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 2:10 pm

all of my english teachers have alwasy told me never to use contractions in writing formal papers... words like isn't, can't, won't etc. should be is not, cannot, will not...etc etc.

Just throwing that out there.

RoamingMadness · Post by **RoamingMadness** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 2:26 pm

Id help but i practically failed english. What i read sounded good though Bane, hope it all works out for ya!

Bane · Post by **Bane** » Tue Jul 17, 2007 7:13 am

Styrofoam wrote:all of my english teachers have alwasy told me never to use contractions in writing formal papers... words like isn't, can't, won't etc. should be is not, cannot, will not...etc etc.

Just throwing that out there.

True. I am a nazi when it comes to stuff like that, I hate contractions when writing more, as you said, formal papers. Sometimes though, one or two slips past my gestapo-eyes and ends up in the final draft.. Makes me pissed off every time that happens.